This is my 3rd blog- feeling happy:)
In this blog I am sharing my understanding and experience about Forgiving- it is divided into 2 segments- Forgive and Forget or Forget and Forgive!
Well, as said life is a series of problems and life is difficult, each individual come across situation which is painful, mixed emotions, not acceptable, etc.- the list goes on and varies from individual to individual.
In my life, I never actually understood the true essence of “Forgiving”. It’s for an instance if someone says “Sorry” to me my anger vanishes and inner feeling comes which is actually satisfying ego and making me feel good for the moment. Actually, it is not forgiving but the beginning step of judging the person and building paradigms- the root cause. According to the Life classes (and I too believe) learning internally being sorry/ apologize requires willpower, empathy, and courage to do it.
Forgiving is interconnected with Change- appreciating the change a person has undergone (for good), being empathetic (boundaries are always there), helping the person to grow, not to impose my perspective but analyzing the situation and giving feedback/ suggestion, clarifying expectations, and the art of listening.
Forgive and Forget OR Forget and Forgive- Well, after undergoing change which is a decision the mind becomes calm as acceptance is there. So forgiving the person will heal the pain and to forget whatever act has happened is a step towards mental peace.
Now what will happen? Well, as said I had first applied the principle of Forgive and Forget and then gradually through deeper understanding moved towards Forget and Forgive which has transformed my way of approach/ understanding towards life- it is a very difficult step. So, it is a choice which is made by an individual.
Problems are big, small, painful, depressing- but the solution is I. If ‘I’ is firm then the intensity of the problem will surely diminish/resolved.
“The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one moment to the next”– Mignon McLaughlin