Love: Pellucid and Lucid.

Love is not a feeling, Love is an action. Love is the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth… Love is as love does. Love is an act of will — namely, both an intention and an action.”

― M. Scott Peck, The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth

I would like to share one of my startled moments during the love class. The moment where I came across the above lines which gave me goosebumps in my mind. Never thought love could actually mean something so beyond than being selfless and sacrificing in nature, on the contrary, according to Peck, love is what ensures spiritual growth of our own self and our partner, antithetical to what is mentioned in literature and movies which I knew is sugary but couldn’t fathom what else could it be and then finally the above statement made all the sense to me in this world!

The word cathexis was originated by Sigmund Freud. It’s defined as the investment of emotional energy into an object or a person, often to an extent that’s unhealthy. Think of it like a romantic obsession or overdose of sexual desire. Peck says cathexis happens when we intently focus on the “falling in love” aspect of a relationship that often happens early on. As a consequence, our love might burn with a bright flame, but soon fizzle into sparks before extinguishing altogether. To prevent this, he suggests we think of love as an action, not a feeling. If our love is genuine, it won’t require lots of feelings at all, since it’s much bigger than cathexis. I couldn’t agree more with him on this.

Thank You Vardan Sir and Ankita Ma’am for introducing us to love classes and this book. And perhaps, writing this post makes me realize yet another cherish-able year came to an end with so many beautiful learnings! I would like to express my gratitude to my love class team for sharing the same joy, for being so open-minded and not judging anyone for that matter, for carrying all the trust and love and for being so supportive. It was a pleasure to be a part of this batch. I cannot thank enough to my facilitators – Bhumika Ma’am and Ritu Ma’am for bringing in life to our classes, to share the bond no less, for being the lighthouse of our effervescent journey and for the scrumptious chocolate cake! 🙂

Love – A never ending experience

Excited, curious and a little nervous for my 2nd journey of life class. Oh! this time it was LOVE.… Love all over… when we hear word ‘love’ what comes to mind is roses, red colours, heart, music, various emojis, spouse, children, friends, chocolates, etc., and much more…

But, after the first session of love class it made me think about what exactly love means. I went back and like all of us do took help of our so called ‘google baba’. And wow! I was amazed by the definition of LOVE given by ‘google baba’ actually got more ????

It said, ‘Scientifically speaking, love is not a single over-arching entity. It is a procession of chemical and psychological changes aimed at securing the passage of genes.  From lust, where we begin to hand-pick the genes that we deem beneficial to our offspring. To attachment, where we finally get the job done. It all makes a surprising — if admittedly underwhelming — amount of sense.’

But, thanks to my facilitators who helped me discover and understand the true meaning of LOVE. I learnt, loving myself for who am I, and trusting myself, if I am happy from within I am the most beautiful person, and that my smile is my best asset.

I learnt the importance of forgiveness. Rightly said by – Martin Luther King, Jr. ‘We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies.’ 

And being a mother I learnt some important tips about ‘Parenting’. I learnt great parenting is not about child’s behaviour but, it is about parents behaviour. In order to become a perfect parent many of us make mistake. In the strive to become a perfect parent we ignore our kids talk, stories, feelings, dreams and we end up saying, ‘I say you follow’. But… but… but… that’s the worst thing that we can do to our children its about us being a friend to them. It is about ‘learning the strengths of our children and dealing with fears that we didn’t know ever existed.’ 

As I truly believe a quote stating, ‘Anyone can have a child and call themselves as ‘a parent’. But, a real parent is someone who puts that child above their own selfish needs, wants and a medium to accomplish their unachieved dreams.’

It was truly a journey worth going through and discovering new meanings and getting to know new perspectives also clearing many myths with wonderful facilitators (Ritu ma’am and Bhumika ma’am) who made me feel just comfortable to share my experiences.

Words would be less to thank them and letting them know what difference have they made in my life through this LOVE classes.

Binal Shah

Life Class 2018 19

  1. The term ‘Life Classes’ itself says that it is a way we can deal and lead our general life problems, through the book by Stephen Covey ‘7 Habits’. I would cherish this opportunity by our school to teach and get insights of our own self. We often confuse and don’t realise the essence of leading a successful life. These sessions gave a bigger picture by explaining through videos, activities, discussions, personal sharings etc. Many emotional ups and downs struck the class but it all summarised to a point of unique solutions. I can now scan and see through the reasons and reactions of my problems. Now I would just reflect on my life with the consciousness of these theories, to lead a simpler life. No, not a life without problems but a life without any baggages and expectations. I loved and give Kudos to our facilitators Mayur Sir and Khushboo Ma’am. Thankyou to the FS culture and management for this wonderful opportunity and insights.

According to Oxford Living Dictionary, the word integrity evolved from the Latin adjective integer, leaning whole or complete.  In this context, integrity is the inner sense of “wholeness” deriving from qualities such as honesty and consistency of character.

As such, one may judge that others “have integrity” to the extent that they act according to the values, beliefs and principles they claim to hold. 

This got me thinking about are we really aware of what our own individual values, beliefs and principles are? To what extent are we honest to our self? (pun intended)

Sometimes, we don’t realize that all our lives, we are living based on adapted integrity qualities of others or even worse, we live with our made up idea on how our character should be and try to hold a strong claim to it. This is all fine till there comes a point where we are not comfortable with those values ourselves or fail to act according to those qualities that we claim to have and relied upon most of our lives.

The very definition of integrity means inner sense of “wholeness” which is I perceive as a feeling we achieve when we have discovered, recognize and accepted ourselves for the values, beliefs and principles that we are deeply connected to as individuals. Well, to discover what these personal integrity values are for us, we need to explore. Which is why many recommend travelling. The more time we spend away from familiar routines, the more we learn to embrace the unknown and abandon ourselves into the great vastness of the universe. We give our a chance to explore different feelings, thoughts, experiences and values which to some we may connect ourselves with and realize them to be our definition of integrity.

However, this may not be the only way, many times, we get such realizations through our life experiences that we go through in our daily life, and if we are conscious enough in noticing our own ways of making decisions and what kind of values we assign to those decisions, we will discover our own integrity. This is when we realize how we are unique in our own way of understanding ourselves and the world around us. This values then help us give a sense of integrity (the feeling of complete and wholeness in our life) in which we are comfortable in our own skin  and this then gives us the strength of face any challenges in our life in a more distinct and meaningful manner.

Integrity

Relinquish everything else and all ideas of righteousness, surrender unto me exclusively. I will deliver you from all sins, do not despair. -Krishna to Arjun on the battle field of Mahabharata.
The above lines can be applied to several contexts, but for me it is something which connects to my understanding of integrity. Thoughts and actions of a person are mostly influenced by the knowledge and values they hold for a certain thing. This knowledge and values are seasoned over time and mostly under set circumstances. Consciously or unconsciously our minds are conditioned to think in a certain way and make decisions which we think are morally correct. But what are these morals? How do we define integrity or righteousness? Can righteousness and human instincts be contradictory? If all humans carry out their part of integrity, would then the world be a better place? Sometimes I think, are my decisions and actions boasting my ego of being the righteous person or is there any higher purpose and value involved, which I feel is more important than me being morally correct. After a certain level of consciousness and connectivity with the supreme, the human instincts surpasses all concepts and ideas of righteousness. So should we drop all ideas of righteousness, moral values or something we believed since ages? No not certainly…but living a life for oneself and living a life for the higher purpose is all what makes the difference!

Feel the fear

Life parts on true, good nature have been very useful in views, knowledge the that is of true, good nature in the true sense of the stretch of time. To my mind, true, good nature is something that we exhibit 1 in our actions and behavior with our strong belief.. These classes have helped to give signs of on living experiences, problems or fears in living and areas that are needed to be worked upon. hearing to others during these Life parts has also been making well off experience. This kind of having the same has helped me to see living from different view. in addition.It is said, There is only one living and to be living many lives in one living, one needs to read books or give attention to groups of persons living stories. This holds true if of these classes as well wherein the ones taking part get knowledge from number times another lives in one living.

good of the authorities for making come into existence chance for such effect on one another. also give (kind attention) to my straightforward thanks to the helpers and ones taking part for their making well off, full of knowledge and to have memories effect on one another. 

Life Class_Reflection_Integrity

Life Classes on Integrity have been very useful in understanding the meaning of Integrity in the true sense of the term. To my mind, Integrity is something that we exhibit in our actions and attitude with our conviction and belief. These classes have helped to reflect on life experiences, problems or fears in life and areas that are required to be worked upon. Listening to others during these Life Classes has also been an enriching experience. This kind of sharing has helped me to see life from a different perspective. Moreover, it has helped in realizing how different people react differently either to different situations or same situations.

It is said, “There is only one life and to live many lives in one life, one needs to read books or listen to people’s life stories.” This holds true in case of these classes as well wherein the participants get insights from multiple lives in one life.

I thank the authorities for creating an opportunity for such interaction. I also extend my sincere thanks to the facilitators and participants for their enriching, insightful and memorable interaction.

Regards,
Mohini Bachani

Art and Skills—–Support Staff

Very rightly said…….It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge—–Albert Einstein.

This year was full of challenges and excitement for us (SurbhiTalwar-Sita Suwalka). We took the the utmost responsibility of taking art and craft classes for the support staff. Initially, we were enthusiastic and bothered how to go about it and finally, we started our first session with introduction and diary making activity in which they gave the reflection of each session.

Our goal was to make them do Best out of waste. Which included bangle making, it was reformed from old bangle. They were very happy when they saw this modification. We took the feedback and decided for the next session. Though Diwali was approaching we decided to make Toran, which was really appreciable. To make best out of waste we also opted making a handbag from old jeans and flower vase from the newspaper.

We thought of making some change so we included cooking activities like Pizza and Nan khatai.

“In learning, you will teach, and in teaching, you will learn.”

Phil Collins

This quote was really applicable to us throughout the year.

Surbhi Talwar–Sita Suwalka

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