Theory and Practice..

We often talk about a lot of what we have learnt in our life-love classes. We often know the theoretical aspects of what these classes teach us. Most of us do know that if we set ourselves a smart goal, progress could be inevitable. Well, we sometimes just feel lazy to do it. We will cross the bridge when we are there. Why worry about it now and break our heads? Don’t we have other better things to do than setting goals for ourselves? Why waste time with this? This is where life/ love classes could be helpful. This is where we ought to learn to put theory into practice. Extending the same situation, we should realise that goals are not about wasting but saving time. How is what we learn in these classes. Reflection, introspection are key terms that the classes stand for as far as I am concerned.
One question that I have been unable to completely resolve lingers. Are we imposing Western values in a our culture which is quite different? Or do we modify these values to our context? For instance, if I were to write a letter of forgiveness to my mother-in-law, do I give it to her? Will it be accepted in a rigidly conservative family? Or would it just end in a family skirmish? Or, I just stop thinking about the consequences, feel the fear and do it anyway? How significant will the impact be on the stakeholders?

My learning journey!

I’m sure that each of us, who has been a part of the life classes @ FS; must have seen some or the other transformations. Be it in their behaviour, mindset, personal or professional life , there’s something which has happened for good. Since years I’ve always believed in the power of positive thinking. Yet there were times when I used to feel helpless and quite low. The 7 habits classes helped me in identifying my circle of concerns and that of influence. It helped me to set my personal mission statement which indeed is work in progress still. But I’m glad to atleast consciously work upon that. The love classes worked like a wonder in my personal as well as professional life. More of acceptance and less of expectations keeps me calm and at peace with myself. The principles learnt in these classes are the key to live a meaningful and a content life. The sharing during the classes makes you think, you can make some connections with your personal life too. At times it gets difficult to accept that such things can really happen with someone. The courage that is shown by the participants is commendable. To be very honest, many of the times I’ve thanked god for blessing me with a less difficult life!!! But yes we know life is difficult, but the acceptance and the learning prepares you to deal with life; with courage, hope and believe.

And now is the time to be principled and work on those weakest points in me. That’s what integrity is all about! Though few simple things seem quite difficult as if I’ve no control on that. But having known that, I don’t give up. Because I ‘m responsible for my life and I ‘ve the ability to respond to the circumstances. I look forward to see yet more positive transformations in my as well as my colleagues’ life. I’m really grateful to god for giving me this wonderful opportunity which we all know as Fountainhead School !! It’s great to be a part of FS .Today I also take this opportunity to thank all my friends, facilitators and co-facilitators for guiding me through this learning journey.

Integrity classes – A challenge worth taking

Being a part of the life classes for all these years and especially attending Integrity for the past three years has made me more patient, a better listener, non-judgmental, empathetic and above all resilient.

 

This platform brings out the diversity as well as the core commonalities of individuals. We are all vulnerable, have our own fears, miseries, insecurities, complaints etc; which are manifested in different ways. But when you have a closer look we are all sailing in the same boat.

 

It’s not about how life treats us or what life gives us. It’s about what we want to make out of our own lives. This is a dais which brings us closer to reality, learn from each other, open up our lives to each other. There is a fear of being ridiculed, being judged, but in reality we all emerge as stronger individuals. Every participant gets to see his or her own life from a variety of perspectives.

 

There is always this apprehension that as a group; we may end up advising or misleading someone. But with the best intentions, we can surely avoid the worst. I read this somewhere – “It is more important to be of pure intention than of perfect action.” And this is what keeps us going.

 

Accepting that life is difficult but taking up the challenge with open hands opens makes life beautiful and worth living.

 

Life is difficult…

After attending the life classes, the most prominent change which I find in me is “The way I look at things now”. Initially, when I attended the life classes the only question in my mind was “How will the sharing done by others help me??”. Gradually, I started listening to others’ problems and how creatively they find the solutions for the same which made me more empathetic. Later, I realized that everyone has to face some or the other challenge in their life but the intensity and the way we respond to it varies. The principle “Bring life to the workshop and workshop to the life” worked miracles for me. I became more observant and even had many paradigm shifts. I have learnt to leave illegitimate pains which made my life easier and took a closer look at the legitimate ones with the thought “Those things that hurt, instruct”.

I am on the path to be self-disciplined by teaching myself to do the unnatural and transform my very own nature. It is extremely difficult, but life classes have taught me not to give up. I thank Zahabiah and Falguni ma’am for being my life class facilitators. Thank you Vardan sir for believing in me and developing the ‘YOU CAN’ attitude in me. I truly appreciate and value everything I have learnt from you.

I want to express my deepest gratitude to Parag bhai. You have been an excellent friend, teacher, mentor and a great inspiration for me. A true master !!

To conclude, I would say that life classes have a lot of things to teach and they are truly worth taking back to your life.

Life is difficult but NOT ALWAYS…!

Self-induced change….

“Life is complex.

Each one of us must make his own path through life. There are no self-help manuals, no formulas, no easy answers. The right road for one is the wrong road for another…The journey of life is not paved in blacktop; it is not brightly lit, and it has no road signs. It is a rocky path through the wilderness. ”

M. Scott Peck

 

And to follow this trail, tenacity is crucial. It is very significant that we do not begrudge our lives but possess the inner strength and wisdom to always polish our lives, learn everything we can where we are and develop the means by which to support our lives. We cannot make the gem inside our lives shine with easy going efforts.

 

Maslow said that less than 2% of human beings are truly growth-oriented; the vast majority are deficit-and-repair oriented—more interested in finding comfort.

 

I was no exception to it. Being part of life classes has helped me learn to respect my own life and appreciate my struggles.  I stopped escaping or detaching myself from struggles and started making conscious efforts to translate my learning into action. And, believe me, I was able to overcome and transform the causes of suffering in my life. The resultant was the self-induced change in my life. It helped me change the negative vision of my life fundamentally.

 

Listening to the participants facing hardships head-on, led me to imbue courage and hope in my own life. These one to one life interactions were the source of support and encouragement that helped me transform my feelings of inadequacy and weakness. I became more strong and compassionate and could expand my life state.  On the other hand, sharing my own struggles and experiences helped me unfold my life and look into the deeper aspects of my life.

We all can transform any negative circumstance into a source of growth and benefit. All we need to do is to courageously engage with the harsh realities of our lives and squarely confront our challenges.

I am truly grateful to one and all, and I want to continue developing my life, always continuing to cultivate inner hope.

Regards,

Ruby

 

My journey as a learner

The five principles of learning which we follow during our life classes are:

  1. Learning is a lifelong process.
  2. Bring life to workshop, and workshop to life.
  3. No one can teach you by force, you can only learn if you are willing.
  4. The best way to learn is to teach, and the best way to teach is to learn.
  5. You have to pay a price for learning.

These principles have added value to my life and have transformed me as a person. If I rewind my journey of Life classes, I can see a drastic change in me. I used to feel sharing life with people, whom you do not know personally makes no sense as they can just advice but can’t empathize. But, now I see things with a different perspective. In fact those people who were not a part of my life helped me deal with my problems effectively, not by advising but by helping me to find out the root cause of the problem.

When I took the decision to facilitate the workshop, I was apprehensive whether I will be able to do justice to the role. But, when I took up the challenge I realized the principle ‘The best way to learn is to teach, and the best way to teach is to learn’ really works.

I would like to thank Falguni ma’am, Zahabiyah ma’am, Vardan Sir, Mita ma’am and Parag Sir for being the facilitators, mentors and guides for this journey of learning.

Regards,

Kruti.

Empower Yourself

Life Classes @ FS

How does one define change? Is change really necessary and desirable? What if one is happy with the status quo? If one is wrestling with these questions, Life Classes @ FS is the right forum to get answers to this natural skepticism and queries. I have experienced tremendous positive changes in my life first as a participant of 7 Habits, Love and Integrity workshops and then as a facilitator of 7 Habits and Integrity workshop. I have become more empathetic, patient and most of all humbled by the trust placed in me by the participants. I see astounding possibilities for growth in each and every participant and I have truly understood the process and importance of delayed gratification. Clarifying expectations has become second nature for me and this genuinely makes life easier, both at the professional as well as the home front. I usually remain in quadrant 2 and encourage people around me to do the same. I have experienced the miraculous healing power of forgiveness (which has empowered me in every sense), have learned the fine art of ‘carefrontation’ and above all I have changed my focus from the problems to their solutions through these workshops. So yes, question the status quo, take risks and play the Russian roulette, go that extra mile and witness amazing positive changes in your life. The best is yet to come!

Ayman Shaikhmahmud

Life and love classes – An attempt to know ourselves genuinely.

Love is patient, kind and honest and for a change its not a garden of roses. In our sessions we understood many new aspects of love. I was too possessive about my son and always thought how he will manage if he is in some other school and I am in a different school, even the timings were too diverse, during the life classes I used to cry a lot, I was feeling tempted to quit but I always remembered one thing my mother kept on repeating since my childhood days “Never give up, keep trying good actions and attempts never go unnoticed.

Thanks to Ayman ma’am and Evelyn ma’am for their guidance and for helping me during life classes. I always felt changes especially where we need to put a lot of efforts, take a long time and it’s a daunting task. It really took a year for me to understand that I need to support and let my son grow as an individual and me too, in fact I was not ready to leave him alone, gradually I started with small changes and now he (Soumya) is much more responsible and knows he needs to take charge of his homework and other important things when I am not around.

It was an extreme and difficult phase in my life as a teacher as well as a mother it was always like a student going for a board exam without preparing or learning anything. I had to keep on trying day in and day out to control my emotions and stop worrying, which I have really worked upon, the process goes on. When I look back I feel happy that my hard work has paid off and there are many small if not big changes in me and my son’s life.

Now in the love class we see an extended version of what we learnt in life class a new aspect of love which is in fact real that it’s not all rosy and hunky dory and how we need to keep on putting efforts in all the relationships and the people we love, we should grow and help them grow as well. Even today it happens that without thinking I display my possessiveness and then ponder on the situation and come back to my senses.

Otherwise, it is like a vicious trap which engulfs our happiness and the happiness of those who are important for us. Love classes are a way or means to understand and learn about what actually love is, it has in some or the other way strengthened my belief to grow ourselves and let others grow too.

When our co-participants share their experiences and try to discuss the pros and cons of the situation, we are also enlightened. Love should not be like a forced thing it should be a way to express and feel free. Love is not a feeling it is an action. This is the most important lesson I learnt till now. Looking forward for new learning and experience in love classes. I sum up my experience with a exhilarating thought:

Love one another and help others to rise to the higher levels, simply by pouring out love. Love is infectious and the greatest healing energy.

Love all serve all….

Ahhh yes…Love Class, it’s hard to imagine that an educational institution actually provides this perk to it’s employees, but it is, what it is…..in it..?

Now the whole kick to this cog is…. it is a mixed batch with married folks, unmarried folks, young women and 2 older men…! ( you see the concoction here..?) plus the instruction is read word for word out of a book, probably published years ago in America, because most of the wisdom applies to them folks that side, who enjoy a bit more liberty then us here in our secular societies and rigid traditions of culture and  living…! OUR INDIA IS GREAT!

In my personal and most humblest opinion, one should be able to be mature and considerate, not to mention, be experienced and knowledgeable on the “L” word ( we tend to use it too loosely over here in our diaspora..!) I ain’t no expert, even though I have been accused of being one, but I ain’t no fool either….like Forrest Gump, I know what love is….!!

There is absolutely no doubt that the “L” class is beneficial in some form or another to all its patrons. The Secret lies in it’s application and understanding of ones true self!

I for one, have realized that one must express his or hers true feelings with courage and confidence without being chastised, only then will the “class” have an impact on the soul. Otherwise, you are just wasting your valuable Saturday and may as well watch paint dry on a wall or something…! It’s like an “AA” class in America, you have to confess your weaknesses and fear and then overcome it with courage and fortitude from within the class…..only thing is we not in America are we now…? So here we are… back to square one…!

 

Thanks for this initiative FS! ( Looking forward to being an impact experienced result oriented instructor, sooner then later…!!)

 

FS PRIDE..!

Sincerely,

“True Love”

Life Classes- A gift to be passed on!

Hello all,

Well, being honest I was just thinking 2 days back to make my page and begin with writing as many friends had inspired me to begin so thought to begin from October and guess I read the mail by Vardan sir that post about the learnings on the blog! Telepathy must say 🙂

To begin with I am transformed- the core reason is Life classes but for me it took time to actually apply and understand the core context of the workshop.

I had been poor in decision making (which I had overcome) now. Still, not perfect but ya, I am growing and much better.

Reason: Love workshop especially has given me better understanding and had answered many of the unanswered questions in my life. Due to these Life classes I developed an interest in understanding and helping the people in a better way for good (not judging them)- why are they angry, frustrated, how can I help them, do they need help, their pain areas, their fear- if nothing I can do I listen carefully.

Connection in my life: My mother undergone change (very much interpreted by me) as my brother got married and time got divided (acceptance of change was missing). She felt at times low which was in action by getting irritated (without any reason), getting angry, isolating herself at times by not communicating with anyone, mood swings, etc. After observing and analyzing (it went on for a month approx), communication and listening was done by us- she demonstrated her anger (which I expected). At least she expressed her emotions. So, then questioning with her permission was done (to understand in a better way the problem). After that we analysed and understood- She needs our TIME which money can’t buy! According to us we were giving time but somewhere rescheduling was required. After doing that surprisingly she changed and now with a better approach. It gave us immense pleasure to understand her feeling which she expressed in a different manner as she was expecting us to understand on our own.

Well, due to Life classes I applied the principles and made my family members to follow the principles which they agreed as it was the apt approach. It boosted my confidence and helped my mom especially to not to go into isolation.

Depression phase had come for all of us (with respect to mom’s action), analysing what hurts her (as she is sensitive) but now there is improvement- the most important element- She is very happy, not dependent but interdependent, she exercise- goes for a walk/runs- alone or with my dad, exercise at home (strength training), yoga (basics). Finally, she took a step forward to utilise her time and she is happy for it!

What I learnt?- Active listening by not judging, being empathetic, understanding gives way to solve the problem as Problems are a part of life and inevitable.

Many more instances to share- probably in my next blog will do so!

Thank you Fountainhead School!

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