Over the past two days in Life Class, I had a meaningful learning experience while exploring emotional intelligence. Before these lessons, I did not completely understand how strongly our emotions can influence the way we think, behave, and respond to different situations.

One of the topics that stood out to me the most was the concept of an amygdala hijack. I learned that this happens when strong emotions, such as anger, fear, or stress, take over and cause us to react without thinking clearly. I realised that I have experienced this in my own life, especially when I am feeling upset or under pressure. However, I also learned that pausing for a moment, taking deep breaths, and thinking before reacting can help us manage our emotions and make better decisions.

Another interesting concept we learned about was the Johari Window, which helped me understand how self-awareness can improve our relationships with others. It made me think about the things I know about myself, the things others know about me, and the qualities or behaviours that I may not be aware of but others can see. I understood the importance of being open to feedback and learning more about myself through my interactions with others.

We also learned about important skills such as self-awareness, empathy, active listening, and expressing our feelings respectfully. These lessons helped me develop a better understanding of both myself and the people around me. I now understand that emotional intelligence is an important skill because it helps us deal with challenges, solve problems, manage difficult situations, and build healthier relationships.

Overall, the two days of Life Class were both interesting and valuable. I learned practical skills that I can use not only in school but also in my everyday life.

Life is not only about achieving goals, earning money, or becoming successful. It is also about understanding ourselves—our emotions, our reactions, our relationships, and the way we respond to situations.

My first two days of Life Class gave me a completely different perspective on how our mind works and how we can create a better life by becoming more aware of ourselves.

Day 1: Understanding and Controlling the Amygdala

On the first day, I learned about the amygdala, the part of the brain that plays an important role in processing emotions, especially fear, stress, and perceived threats.

One of the most interesting concepts I learned was how we can “hijack” the amygdala.

An amygdala hijack happens when an emotional reaction becomes so strong that we respond immediately, often before our logical thinking has a chance to take over. Someone says something that hurts us, someone criticizes us, or something unexpected happens—and suddenly we react.

The important lesson for me was that a trigger is not the same as a response.

A trigger may be outside our control, but what we do after being triggered can become our responsibility.

Understanding My Triggers

I also learned the importance of self-awareness.

Instead of simply asking, “Why did that person make me angry?”, I can ask myself:

• What exactly triggered me?
• What am I feeling right now?
• Why did this situation affect me so strongly?
• Am I reacting to the present situation or something from my past?
• What response will actually help me?

This small pause can create a big difference.

The Real-Life Value

I can see how useful this learning is in everyday life.

At home, at work, in friendships, or in difficult conversations, we are constantly exposed to situations that can trigger emotional reactions. If I react immediately, I may say something I regret later.

But if I become aware of the trigger, pause, breathe, and think before responding, I create space between emotion and action.

That space is powerful.

It gives me the opportunity to choose my response instead of allowing my emotions to choose it for me.

For me, controlling the amygdala does not mean suppressing emotions. It means understanding my emotions and responding to them consciously.

That was one of my biggest learnings from Day 1.

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Day 2: Building Psychological Safety

The second day took me deeper into something equally important: psychological safety.

I learned that people perform, communicate, and grow better when they feel safe enough to express themselves, ask questions, make mistakes, and share their thoughts without constantly fearing judgment or rejection.

Psychological safety is not simply about being comfortable.

It is about creating an environment where people can be honest, heard, respected, and supported.

Dependability

The first concept that stood out to me was dependability.

Trust grows when people know they can rely on us.

Being dependable means doing what we say we will do, taking responsibility, communicating clearly, and showing consistency.

It made me think about a simple question:

“Can people count on me?”

That question applies not only to professional life but also to family, friendships, and relationships.

Structure

I also learned the importance of structure.

When there is no structure, people can feel confused about what is expected from them.

Clear roles, processes, responsibilities, and expectations help people feel more secure and confident.

Structure does not necessarily restrict people. Instead, the right structure can give people the freedom to focus and perform better.

Clarity

Another important learning was clarity.

Many conflicts are not actually caused by bad intentions. They happen because of misunderstandings, assumptions, or unclear communication.

Being clear about expectations, responsibilities, goals, and communication can prevent unnecessary confusion.

I realized that sometimes we expect people to understand things that we have never clearly communicated.

Meaning

Finally, I learned about meaning.

People need to understand not just what they are doing, but why it matters.

When we connect our actions to a bigger purpose, our work and relationships can become more meaningful.

Meaning gives us a reason to care.

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My Biggest Takeaway

The first two days of Life Class taught me something important:

The quality of my life depends greatly on how well I understand myself and how intentionally I interact with others.

Day 1 was about looking inward—understanding my triggers, becoming self-aware, and learning to manage my emotional reactions.

Day 2 was about looking outward—creating psychological safety through dependability, structure, clarity, and meaning.

Together, these lessons showed me that personal growth is not only about changing what happens around me.

It starts with changing how I understand, interpret, and respond to what happens around me.

I am beginning to realize that emotional control is a skill, self-awareness is a strength, and psychological safety is something we can create for ourselves and for the people around us.

These two days were not just lessons for me.

They were a reminder that a better life begins with a better understanding of ourselves—and a more conscious way of connecting with others.

The Leader in the Mirror: Why Emotional Intelligence Matters in Leadership

Whether in a classroom, staffroom, or workplace, leadership often comes down to how we respond to situations. Some leaders react immediately, while others take a moment to understand the situation and respond thoughtfully. The difference is not necessarily intelligence or experience, but emotional intelligence (EQ)—the ability to understand our own emotions, recognise those of others, and respond appropriately.

Four important tools can help leaders develop stronger emotional awareness and communication skills.

1. Amygdala Hijack: Understanding Our Emotional Reactions

An amygdala hijack occurs when an emotional response takes over before we have had a chance to think rationally. This can happen when we feel challenged, criticised, frustrated, or threatened.

In such situations, our immediate reaction may be stronger than the situation actually requires. The key leadership skill is not to suppress emotions but to recognise them and create a small gap between the emotion and our response.

Taking a few seconds to pause, breathe, identify the emotion, and think about the appropriate response can prevent an impulsive reaction. This short pause can help us respond with greater clarity and maturity.

Leadership takeaway: Effective leaders learn to pause before reacting. The ability to manage our response during a triggering situation can significantly influence the way others experience our leadership.

2. Johari Window: Understanding Our Blind Spots

The Johari Window, developed by Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham, is a useful framework for understanding self-awareness. It consists of four areas:

• Open Area: Things we know about ourselves and others also recognise.
• Blind Spot: Things others notice about us that we may not recognise ourselves.
• Hidden Area: Things we know about ourselves but do not openly share with others.
• Unknown Area: Aspects that are not yet known to either ourselves or others.

The Blind Spot is particularly important for leadership. We may believe that we are being clear and direct, while others may perceive us differently. Similarly, a leader may feel they are giving their team independence, while team members may interpret it as a lack of support.

Seeking honest feedback can help us identify and reduce these blind spots.

Leadership takeaway: Self-awareness develops when we are willing to listen to perspectives that may be different from our own. Asking for constructive feedback is an important part of becoming a better leader.

3. SBI Feedback: Giving Feedback Effectively

The SBI model—Situation, Behavior, Impact—provides a structured way to give constructive feedback.

• Situation: Clearly describe when or where something happened.
• Behavior: Explain the specific behaviour that was observed.
• Impact: Describe the effect that the behaviour had.

This approach keeps feedback focused on observable actions rather than personal characteristics. It avoids statements such as “you always” or “you never” and instead focuses on what actually happened and its impact.

Leadership takeaway: Effective feedback should be specific, objective, and focused on improvement. When feedback is communicated without personal judgement, it becomes easier for the other person to understand and act upon it.

4. RAIN Method: Managing Difficult Emotions

The RAIN method provides a structured way to deal with difficult emotions:

• R – Recognize: Identify and acknowledge what you are feeling.
• A – Allow: Accept the emotion without immediately judging or resisting it.
• I – Investigate: Explore what triggered the emotion and understand your response.
• N – Nurture/Non-identification: Respond to yourself with understanding and remember that an emotion is something you experience, not something that defines you.

Practising this approach can help develop greater emotional awareness and make it easier to manage challenging situations.

Leadership takeaway: Emotional regulation is a skill that develops through regular practice. Leaders who manage their emotions effectively also create a positive example for the people around them.

Bringing the Ideas Together

These four tools are closely connected. RAIN helps us become aware of and process our emotions. This awareness can help prevent an amygdala hijack and create space for a thoughtful response. The Johari Window encourages us to understand our blind spots through feedback, while the SBI model provides a clear and constructive way to give feedback to others.

Ultimately, emotional intelligence is not simply an additional leadership skill. It plays an important role in how we communicate, manage challenges, build relationships, and support others.

Effective leadership begins with leading ourselves—understanding our emotions, managing our reactions, remaining open to feedback, and responding with intention rather than impulse.